Hello Everyone!
I am always trying to figure out if I am posting to the correct area. This is such a big and
wonderful site and I would just like to jump around to each area like a little kid!
I have not been around for a time due to the shock, though expected, of my brother's death!
I made sounds and noises as if I was okay and everything was peachy keen, but in my heart
I was and still am, to an extent, so sad for the smallness of his life and the sad and dark
places in his heart. I cannot thank you all who wrote to me personally and sent cards.
I am on an incredibly slow computer and sometimes dont get a chance to "see" pretty things
or imbedded things, so please dont think I ignored you during this time. I am so grateful for
your kind thoughts.
As soon as my brother passed on, the real estate agent who has been trying to dupe us out
of my mothers property came on full force! I have been gathering information to take over
the property as I am the last one standing for now. I know ZIP about real estate but I know
that in spite of the deterioration of the house which is over one hundred years old, the land
it sits on is HUGE and could be sold to someone who offers more than the piddly sum that
has been offered. I have a big task ahead, as there are back taxes, etc...but I am going to
go as far as the Lord allows me!
I am asking prayers as I go into these treacherous waters with barely a pair of boots on!
My hope is built on nothing less than JESUS CHRIST and righteousness. He is my solid rock
and my only hope. I have been given such confirmation that this is the way to go so when
I come asking for prayer or with my fists to the wind, you will know why.
In the meantime, please allow me to pray for you all and I will stay as close as time and
this cantankerous machine will allow me to. There is much more that I could say but I am
so filled with long overdue tears, a need to be hugged where there is no one to do so
and an abiding reassurance that God is on my side. He is on YOUR side too~
In Christ
Zenobia
Zee, I am praying for you. I understand your pain of loss and the pain of just thinking how much more his life could have been. My brother, who died in April, was a musician and singer with so much potential......he was so good..but drugs and alcohol became his life. The liver cancer was so terrible to watch....and I grieved for him and was angry too. I still get angry.....and still hurt too.
This will be a process, as you know. Please allow yourself the feelings as they come. Our wonderful Jesus will be right there with you, He will take you in His arms and hold you.
Thank you for reaching out, even in your own pain. Nita
Thanks so much Nita! I just enjoy coming to this site so much. You all make me feel so welcome! Thanks again....we shall pray for one another.
In Him, Zee
Quote from: Zeebers on January 10, 2005, 11:13:12 PM
I am asking prayers as I go into these treacherous waters with barely a pair of boots on! My hope is built on nothing less than JESUS CHRIST and righteousness. He is my solid rock and my only hope. I have been given such confirmation that this is the way to go so when I come asking for prayer or with my fists to the wind, you will know why.
There is much more that I could say but I am so filled with long overdue tears, a need to be hugged where there is no one to do so and an abiding reassurance that God is on my side. He is on YOUR side too~
In Christ
Zenobia
I'm here, too, ZEE ... I applaud your raw honesty and strong faith in our Father who knows and understands even these feelings -- especially these feelings.
As Nita said, this is a process we must go through ... don't try to rush it or ignore it. Just allow the feelings to come and, at those times, crawl up in Father's lap and let Him hold you and brush away the tears ... He is so loving and comforting at times like this.Â
I pray He will bless you especially tonight and I look forward to knowing you are safe in His arms of love.
Jane
Good Morning Sisters!
Hi Jane! Thank you for your kind words. I should know by now that repressing sadness does
no good whatsoever, but for some reason, I have done it much of my life..only to suffer for it
later, so this time I AM going to the Father and weeping and grieving and allowing God to get
in there and do what He does best which is to give us comfort in our sad times. I dont know
why we suffer needlessly. Even as a child, I remember singing the song "Take It To The Lord In Prayer".
A little smile came to my face when I remember one of my brother's favorite songs as a child.
It was "Love Lifted Me" and would sing it at the top of his lungs. Being little, I guess about
four years of age, he often got most of our songs from church wrong, so his rendition sounded
like, "Love LIFT-A-ME" and "What A Fellowship" turned into "Wow, wow the fire truck"!!
as he LOVED fire trucks all of his life. May I share something? I remember one Christmas
when he had asked Santa for a fire truck that he could really ride in and when he got up
and it was there, he fell backwards in a faint. There is was, in all of its hook and ladder splendor
with a bell he could ring and a place to sit, along with a firemans' hat.
Our parents always made a big deal out of Christmas.
Anyway, he continued his love of rescue missions and when he entered the Air Force in the
seventies, he was in the fire fighting division. Mother simply had fits to know that her baby
was jumping out of planes, fighting fires. I thought it was a hoot! The "baby" was doing
what the baby loved best! LOL
I love sharing these memories with others. They are part of the book I am writing and now
seem more precious than ever!
God bless you today! We finally got a little snow in these parts...we usually have it LONG
before now!
Love and Blessings
Zee
Zee I too am praying for you. Just let those wonderufl memorie flow and lean on our Father, ias His loving arms hold you and comfort you in you grieveing period. This too shall pass, but in God's time.